anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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