Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Randomize
