2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
