Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
foreskin is a definite game changer
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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