My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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