okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
He kissed a someone with a penis
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize