try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize