Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
