When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Randomize
