you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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