call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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