NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
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