I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
