I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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