This girl is more easily done than said...
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize