Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
i used baking grease as lip gloss
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
