Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
NoShamevember. You game?
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
