what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
