I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
