A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
that may or may not have been my penis.
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