Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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