That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
