"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize
