i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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