my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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