I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
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