6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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