Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
