Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
You pole danced in your parka.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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