At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
40s are totally the cure
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize