i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
We're too hungover to prance.
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