ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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