I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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