He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Randomize
