no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
My feet surprised me
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize
