it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
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