I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Randomize
