Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
