She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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