Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
He shit in the fireplace
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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