Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
