"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Randomize
