at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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