Yo dont text me then not text me
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
