We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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