Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
