I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
is that a dick in a sweater?
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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