I can tuck mytits in my pants
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize
