guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
