Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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